It's been 2 years and 1 day he left. What can I say. Somebody loves him more than I do. But to be honest, who wants to go through this suffering ? Nobody wants to. But I'm over it now and I think I can take the challenge. Life is far harder than this, face it fera. So, after I prayed yesterday, I recited him Yassin. And what surprised me more was that, on the night of our Maths paper, I had a dream. And it was about him.
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And in the dream, we had this conversation on the phone. I asked how he's doing and he said that he's fine. He told me to take care of myself good and study hard.Bla Bla Bla
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And after that, when I woke up, I just realised it was a dream and we did actually talked I think. The phone must have connected me to him on the other side of life, but in dreams. I realised my pillow drenched and my eyes are hurt and dry. I think I cried. But when thinking about it after I finished my Maths paper, I really did cried back when I told Suffi I dreamt about him until my whole way back to R1 from lunch and when Im replying some people text messages, the one who actually care.
People around were looking, but I dont really care.
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I still remember, 2 years and 1 day ago, while I was in class, studying hard for SPM. Then a guy from the administrative office came and asked me to the principal's office. I sensed something was wrong because I'm not the one who always make trouble. Nobody in the office could actually said the news to me. I knew about it when I saw my PK(HEM) hold the small note, written with your news. Without a word, I hold in my fist, and bit my lips. And of course then, tears were flowing like crazy. I couldn't even speak. Not a word can be express in phrases. A word out, tears out. And I have to find excuses to tell my friends that I'm leaving without cracking up infront of them, to leave the school right away during the recess hour. But then, I put my guard down. I failed to control my emotion. I couldn't speak in exact 5 days to prevent crying. Yes, it really did happened. And all these while, if I ever listen to Katy Perry-Thinking of You, I should really be alone or anyone around will witness a teary scene. That's the song that reminds me of him.
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You're like the best boyfriend I ever had. You hold me up when I'm down. You took care of me. You were such a nice person. I love you so much. Yes,I miss you. And I will never stop praying for youu. InsyaALLAH. I was really hoping you could read this by any chance, but I know there's none.
AL-FATIHAH ♥
For him and for Yana's Wan too. It's on the same day.
May their souls are blessed by ALLAH.
Aminnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
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4 comments:
Alfatihah babe. I guessed, we faced the same situations over here.
:')
What a nice entry.... :)
i'm crying rite now...sob3...
u're a strong lady fera. remember our conversation in mcD ipoh. :) i love you. take care.
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